


Find Harry

by ONLYFOR91



Category: Larry Stylinson - Fandom, One Direction (Band)
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe, Arguments, Bucket List, M/M, Other, mentions of previous death, one direction - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-10
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-15 15:41:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,445
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29316513
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ONLYFOR91/pseuds/ONLYFOR91
Summary: Louis and Harry have a mutual friend, Colby. However, they have never met and live completely different lifestyles. Upon the death of their friend, Louis receives a letter telling him to find Harry and together, they have to complete their late friend's wishes, his bucket list.
Relationships: Larry Stylinson
Comments: 5
Kudos: 12





	1. Chapter 1

"My sweet Louis,  
If this letter finds you, all is not well. You should know I always looked up to you, ‘in the night and the light, forever,’ that is what we said. You will always be my brother, and as you know, times get tough, I am writing this as they are looking for me. Therefore I must make this quick. I have another life. I am one with the wind and like to roam free. I found a whole other world, a quiet place, that is where I found my love. I am asking you to do something for me. Complete my wishes. Find Harry.  
I wish you all the best,  
Until you find me again,  
Colby x"

The letter lay sad on the floor, accompanied by a half drank bottle of Corona and some underwear from the night before. Louis was never the type to bring people into his home after a night out; it was always his safe place away from the blinding lights in the city. He was sure this was a city that never slept, it was no New York, but it was home for Louis. His hair was close to an explosion, some parts sticking up and some stuck to his face with sweat. He brought his hand up to wipe the side of his oily face, still half asleep, a piece of red hair fell into his line of sight. Louis knew one thing he needed to get on with his life. He strolled through his expensive house, alone, until he could hear the excited tapping of his dogs. Bruce and Clifford. Their barks echo in the big room. Louis had trained them well, but they would always get excited when they saw him.

“Alright, boyo’s,” he said, fussing them both at the same time, never giving one more fuss than the other. All the while Louis was feeding the dogs, his mind wandered to the letter, to Harry. Who was he? Why did he need to find him? These were questions to which Louis would not get the answers. He was too weak, he missed his friend terribly, and he did not feel up to the challenge of finding a man whom he did not know.

Louis skipped out on his daily activities for the next week. He worked from his father, and he had allowed him a week off to wallow in sadness and grieve for his friend. He was slowly slipping into a state of depression which he had met before, as a young, stupid, teenage boy that fell in love. Colby was there for him last time, to pick up his pieces and solve his puzzle. However, this time he was alone. He knew he was alone. There was no way out of this for Louis. He gathered his dogs at the front door and took them out into the cold, frosty morning; he was dressed in black Adidas sweatpants, his white socks folded over the tops to keep all the warmth in that he could. The top half of his body was covered with a black hoodie and a blue denim boyfriend jacket. On his feet, he sported black converse that was dirty from the paws of his betters. The two bundles of joy pounced and frolicked through the stale grass, Louis let a smile appear on his face only for a second, it happened at the speed of light, an on-goer would not have noticed. Clifford barking brought Louis out of his head, hushing the dog, as it was early morning, Louis went to inspect what Clifford had found. “Hush lad, what have you got?” Louis’ tired legs carried him to the dogs; it was just a bench. “You want us to sit and have a rest. I can deal with that.” Louis sat quietly, looking into the sunrise, equally petting his two dogs. The orange and pink tones reflected onto Louis’ pale face, he snapped a photo of Clifford and Bruce sat like two old-men on the bench. “A pair of ol’ chaps ay,” Louis giggled and began inspecting the photograph, showing it to the brown and black bundles next to him, it was not long before Clifford started barking. “What now? You don’t like the photo? We should take another?” Louis spoke to his dog, receiving nothing but barks back. He began taking several photos of the dogs on this one bench, even a couple selfies with them. As Louis snapped another, he noticed there was a carving in the bench he had not seen before. 

"Harry" 

The name Harry was engraved on the bench, Louis being the superstitious man he is, got up and left immediately. He automatically knew what he had to do.

When Louis arrived at his home, he slipped his shoes off aggressively at the door and ran up the stairs. Once he was in his spare room, he wasted no time reaching for the chair, in the corner of the room, he used it as a stepping stool to the top shelf in the closet. His hands were shaking as they searched for the locked box. He rushed around his house like a madman, searching for everything he needed. After half an hour of chaos, Louis plopped himself into his seat at the kitchen island. His kitchen was grey marble with seats that were a matching grey; it took Louis some time to find a person who would make the chairs the same colour as the table. He was a perfectionist at heart and wanted his home to be perfect, even better than all his friends, that was before he lost his best friend, now he did not care that the seats were matching grey to his dumb marble table. He was sitting at it alone, with a box, a key, a bottle of beer and the letter that he had read every night when he could not sleep. The words ‘Find Harry’ tormented him when he had nothing on his mind, which was always, especially now that Louis did not care about anything. He was regularly in a state of talking to himself like he had a devil and an angel on his shoulder, recently the devil had always been winning. 

Louis opened the box. He stifled through papers, bank statements, photos that unlocked memories he had stored away or forgotten about, and a set of keys; he took his time going through everything. He had his glasses perched at the end of his nose, while his lips became chapped as he chewed on them and pulled them between his fingers, it did not take long for him to have rivers of salty tears running down his face, ones he had never let slip before. 

On his hunt for information, Louis knew he needed to find where Colby’s other life was. It was not too hard as inside the box was mail addressed to a house in a little village called Hambleden, it was just over an hour away from London. Louis also saw a set of keys which he assumed were for the house. Tomorrow was a new day and a new week. Louis popped to the store, buying some essentials for his trip, even though he had no idea what to expect. He had also bought brown hair dye as he was tired of the red, which Colby had done as they were rebelling his father, even at the age of twenty-two he did anything to push his father over the edge. 

Louis’ shower was huge; he did not need all the space since the only people that ever used it were him and Colby. The walls were pure white, and the floor was once again a grey marble. He placed his black towel on the side before taking off his clothes, item by item and tossing them into the basket. He turned the water on and let it get hot before stepping in, letting the water run over his pale, tired body. Thoughts roamed inside Louis’ mind about all the possibilities of what could happen when he goes to Colby’s other house. He let himself go to a scary place, thinking about how well he knew his best friend, his brother because Louis never knew that Colby found love in another place, let alone that he even had another place. While applying shower gel all over his body Louis was listening to himself, he knew how tired he was, and hoped that by completing Colby’s wishes he would somehow come out the other end in a better place.


	2. Chapter 2

Louis woke up to the sun peeking through his curtains; his eyes were swollen and crusty. It was the start of an adventure for Louis today, and he was not going to lie and say he was not nervous, because he was. As he began packing his clothes, his head was filling quickly with possible outcomes for his adventure. He could go to this house, everything would be Colby’s and he would breakdown and finally grieve for his friend. Or he could find this Harry person to find out he had been set up and Harry would kill him. 

Louis looked at himself in the mirror, he began brushing his teeth while staring at his reflection, flicks of toothpaste flying to the mirror every so often. Louis started doing his skincare, the man promised he would not let himself get wrinkles, he would never forgive himself. In the past week, Louis had been too depressed to even look at himself in the mirror, let alone do his whole routine, allowing his skin to become dry. Nonetheless, he had a quick shave, so his stubble was minimal. Louis began pottering around and found the clean clothes that he had picked out the night before and put them on. Louis was not used to travelling, he was hoping he would not run into anyone on his journey and was dressing for comfort, his outfit consisted of his famous black vans and white socks pulled up, he had loose-fitted grey jogger shorts on paired with a black hoodie. He combed a shaky hand through his hedgehog hair and shrugged his shoulders. 

“I’m going to miss my babies,” Louis ruffled the thick fur of both his dogs, kissing their heads as they barked and tried to play. “I’ll be back soon, you are staying with uncle Ni, you love him,” Louis heard a grunt behind him and a small laugh. “What, I have to say goodbye, or they will be nightmares for you.” The man laughed and rolled his eyes.

“You’ve spoiled them, that is why. What are you doing anyway, that means you'll be out of town for this long?” Louis pondered in his head whether he would tell Niall, or whether he would lie. 

“Business, I have to do somethings for Colby,” Louis mentally smacked himself, he had used Colby as an excuse too many times, it was a habit he could not break. 

“Colby?” Niall’s eyes saddened and became soft focusing on the man in front of him. 

“Yes, I have to go to his family, help plan and things; I'm ok it will only take a few days.” The boys hugged as Louis threatened Niall to take care of his dogs and he was on his way. 

He secured his luggage in his car boot and made his way to the driver’s seat. Louis’ hands were no longer shaking, but he knew if he thought about things, the shaking would start again. His mind was often a scary and dark place, so he played songs from his favourite band and relived memories of going to their concerts with his sweet Colby. 

Louis drove down country roads with his windows rolled down, music blasting, he let his hair flow free. His mind was empty, he was unaware that this was the only peace he would be getting for the next few days.

The sky became a mixture of red and orange, “red sky at night, Shepard’s delight,” he sighed to himself and pulled the car to a stop on the side of a road. It did not take him long to realise he was about 10 minutes out from the address, taking a map between his cold hands and then double-checking his route using his phone. Louis looked out into the distance, he could see the outline of a small town, all the bright lights that began to look like stars. “Did I know you at all or was I playing pretend?” Louis mumbled to himself, taking a much-needed drag on the cigarette. Louis had now propped his small body onto the hood of his car, knowing the whole time he was not ready to walk into Colby’s other life. His stomach felt nervous, he had butterflies but not the good kind, he had a bad feeling, but he knew this was right. 

Louis’ tummy felt like a whole galaxy was being produced in him, black holes being created while at the same time, planets were being lost that had not yet been discovered. He was creating love stories on planets that were being hit by others, crashing into the unknown. Louis followed his gut, taking his car to the address. 

The house was cute, little, and stood behind a garden filled with pretty flowers and bushes. The driveway was open, Louis pulled up hearing the crunches of stones underneath his wheels. The house stood like a dolls house as nothing was going on inside, all the lights were off, curtains closed like no one was home. Louis fished in his rucksack that laid messily over the front seat, finding the keys and praying silently that the keys belonged to this house to anyone that would listen. “Deep breaths, breathe Louis,” He talked himself into moving. He checked his phone and the time read 12:46 PM, he knew people would be around, and he was making himself look sus. He stepped out of the car, looking at the neighbouring houses, they all looked the same, all the gardens presented with flowers and cute little shrubs. 

Shakily, Louis lifted his hand to the door placing the key over the hole without pushing it in. “Please,” he whispered, and began pushing forward, and turned the key. Louis gasped at the sound of clicking, as the lock was opening, the most heavenly sound Louis had heard in a while. It did not take him long to step in and shut the door behind him, adjusting to the scene. 

The inside of the house was just as pretty as the outside. He walked in coming face to face with a room filled with books from the floor to the ceiling. A library? He followed the room around into a dining room where an island was in the middle, an empty fruit bowl standing in the middle with a few letters. Continuing through the house, Louis was getting more and more astounded, looking with his eyes and every so often getting his hands involved. He reached across the little table, gripping the mail and reading the name, thankfully they were all addressed to Colby. This was his house. Louis stopped for a second, his brain suddenly became overwhelmed realising he was standing in his best friend’s house for the first time and he was dead. “Why didn’t you tell me, you little shit. I can imagine you laughing, ‘get your grubby mittens off my books,’ pushing me away. We could have read in the garden like two old men together,” Louis felt it coming, this was the universe he created for himself while he was sat alone on the bonnet of his car, smoking, hoping to one day join his friend again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy valentines day loves, thank you for reading this ily<333


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning // There is a scene of violence and mentions of blood in this chapter, it's a little headbutt near the end. Please do not read this chapter unless you're ok with that. Sending Love and hope you're staying safe <3

Louis took his time going through everything, taking in every detail he saw. He noticed a small bulletin board, his legs quickly waddling over to it, taking it off the wall and placing it steadily on the table. There were pictures of Colby and Louis pinned in each of the corners. Also, scattered across the board were pictures of Colby with a boy Louis had never seen before, accompanying it were several letters that had no meaning to Louis. He pushed them all out the way and pulled the picture off the board to examine it closely. As he did, he noticed a sticky note fall to the floor; he bent way down to reach for it, wiping any dirt that had got onto it from the floor. The note displayed a telephone number, no name or any indication as to who's it was. 

“Colby?” Louis heard someone shouting even though he had not heard them come in; twisting on the chair, he slowly turned the corner. “Who the fuck are you?” Louis asked as he looked at the man standing in front of him; he has dark hair, not styled it was just sat on his head and even though he was not next to Louis, he could tell that the man stood in front of him was taller. His clothes were simple, a plain black top matched with blue jeans. No one likes blue jeans, Louis thought to himself without saying it. 

“Louis?” The man spoke his name with ease like he was remembering him, which made Louis uncomfortable as he switched his weight from one leg to the other. “How do you know my name?” Louis questioned, his eyes turned to slits as he became suspicious. “Colby talks about you all the time. Where is he? Is he here?” Louis felt a sudden wave of sadness through his entire body, feeling himself becoming quickly fatigued. Louis ignored the man standing in front of him, asking his question again, “Who are you?” his voice came out quiet but he was heard. “Oh, sorry. I’m Liam; I live here with Colby.” Liam spoke quietly; Louis began to think he was the shy type, “Where is he?” Liam smiled, unaware of the horrific words he was about to endure. 

"Liam, i-I’m sorry,” Louis noticed that breathing was becoming hard, chest rising and falling at a rapid pace and not knowing how to stop it. “What’s going on? You are scaring me.” Liam admitted while helping Louis to a vacant seat. “He- um, he died, two weeks ago,” hot tears ran over Louis’ cheeks, his nose was stuffy, and eyes were becoming itchy, but Louis ignored the feeling. Instead, he focused on the feeling of guilt that ran through him as no one had notified Liam of his friend's death. “What? No, he did not. Why did no one tell me?” Liam mirrored Louis’ actions, taking a seat as tears fell from his eyes, he did not want to believe that his best friend was dead. “No one knows you exist; this part of his life was a secret, nobody knew,” Both Louis and Liam had no idea what to say, awkwardly looking at anything but each other. “Nobody knew. How are you here? Did you know?” Liam asked questions, his head shaking in disbelief with hints of confusion showing on his face and rightly so, no one knew he existed, yet he lived with Colby. “He gave me a letter before he died, knowing it was going to happen.” Louis reached into his bag, pulling out a crumpled and dirty letter. He handed it gently to Liam, hoping maybe he could make sense of it, or even better, maybe he knew who Harry was. Louis studied Liam as he read over the letter, muttering the words to himself and shaking his head. 

“Find Harry?” the shocked boy read those words aloud, taking Louis back. “Do you know who he is?” The lost boy sat in a foreign house, had a glimpse of hope in his eyes for once. The feeling in Louis’ tummy returned for the umpteenth time since he had arrived at the house. If Liam knew who Harry was, he was taking his time spitting any information out as he stared into nothing. Louis whispered his name, hoping Liam would be able to help him. Liam slowly nodded his head, this caused an eruption in Louis' tummy as he felt like he had made progress once again. 

“Let me call him.” Louis’ eyes popped out of his head, he knew who Harry was. His hunt was over and he had many questions for Harry. Louis stared at the back of Liam’s head as he walked some distance away, Louis watched his every move, not taking his eyes of the man even for a second. 

“Hi Haz, Are you busy? I’m at Colby’s I need you to come here, yes now. Louis is here; there is something you need to hear. Yes, Harry, you need to hear this,” Liam turned and gave a soft smile to Louis, his lip quivered, suddenly unable to contain his emotions, breaking down abruptly; tears were falling at a fast pace, the boy could not catch them quick enough. Louis was disorientated in this new place as it was not his, and now he had no idea how to help Liam stop crying. Louis was never the comforting type that was always on the other boy; he remembered how Colby would always find a distraction for him. 

“How did you and Colby meet?” Louis asked questions to fill the awkward space as he helped Liam to the sofa, as the other man had done for him minutes prior. “I own a bookstore, about ten minutes away and as you can see, the man liked to read,” Liam laughed, which was followed by a hiccup. “He has a Library at my place too, he was always walking in with random books for me, then we would sit on my balcony and read them together,” Louis smiled at the memory as tears pricked in his eyes letting Liam share a story similar. 

“Oh- Can I get you a drink or something? We have Yorkshire tea, Colby always had this one in, always saying it is your favourite,” Liam offered, but Louis knew that it was to fill the awkward silence and to distract himself from the news he had received. Louis politely declined, telling Liam he was ok and asking for more stories about their friend. 

Moments later, the door burst open and was slammed shut just as fast, making Liam and Louis jump out of their skin. A giant stomped aggressively into the room that was occupied by the two crying men. Within seconds Louis was yanked up and pinned against the nearest wall; no one had time to react to the pure speed that this man came in with. “Harry, what the fuck?” Liam questioned as he put his hand around the man's arm. Louis was bewildered, looking into the forest green eyes that showed nothing but anger. Harry’s skin looked smooth but showed dark circles under each eye, his eyebrows were tamed and shaped his face nicely. His hair was long, dark and reaching his shoulders, showing a hint of grease coming from the roots. Louis could feel Harry’s minty breath fanning across his face as he began to talk.

“Where is he? I’ve been looking for you for a whole week and you just show up at his house,” Harry was looking for Louis, this shocked him, but he stayed silent, not letting the exasperated man intimidate him. Louis had been in enough bar fights and had people pin him against the walls angrily he did not care anymore, he had the patience, sometimes winding people up so they would do it, he was used to this feeling. “Answer me!” Harry shook Louis from the grip he had on his hoodie. “Put me down,” Louis said in a monotone voice, almost as if he was bored. But it angered Harry more as he pulled Louis up higher and letting out a low growl. “Listen Pup, if you do not put me down and give me some distance in the next five seconds, my head is going to break your nose,” Liam stood beside the boys in shock. Bordem was very evident on Louis' face. Harry was showing anger and no signs of backing down. 

“Answer my questions Pipsqueak, then I’ll let you down. Where is Colby?” Liam told Harry to let Louis down again, but he shrugged him off, pulling Louis from the wall only to throw him back against it. “Where is he, Louis?” This was not going how Louis planned, but before anyone could blink an eye, Louis had brought his head down with force, colliding it with Harry’s own. Harry dropped Louis from his grip, reaching for his nose. “What the fuck?” Harry shouted as he had blood pouring from his nose. Louis kept himself composed, still showing nothing but bordem across his features, showing the man he was not dealing with his shit.

“Colby is dead. He died two weeks ago. I am in no mood to be manhandled by someone I did not even know existed until I got his letter. I do not know who you are or what I am doing, but I do know that Colby is 6 feet under in London, and I needed to find you.” Louis was raising his voice at the two men, who seemed to both be looking at him as if he was going mad. “You don’t know who we are?” Harry questioned, sadness filling his tone; Louis shook his head, feeling the familiar pain in the back of his throat and nose. He was on the verge of tears once again. “If you didn’t come in all guns blazing, Harry, he would have said that.” Liam patted Harry on the shoulder as he guided him to the kitchen to give him aid on his nose. Louis took a deep breath that came out shakier than he intended. 

This was going to be a lot harder than he thought, gently slapping both his cheeks, he began following the boys into the other room.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw // violence, mentions of drug use and homophobia. These are not my opinions. Do not read if these topics make you uncomfortable and my dms are always open on my twitter- @froggynouis <3

“I’m guessing when Colby disappeared for weeks on end, he was in London.” Liam makes the statement to fill the awkward tension as his hand is full, with ice wrapped in a cloth for Harry. Louis stood, leaning against the door frame looking at the two men in front of him. 

“Yes, he has a house there,” Louis confirms, “I do not recall him ever spending time away from his house, to be honest, how long did he stay here?” 

Harry scoffs at everything Louis is saying, leaving Louis confused each time he hears it. Liam eventually grows annoyed with Harry and gently taps him on the back of his head. 

“He came back a lot on weekends, holidays, times like that,” Liam replied as Harry continued to roll his eyes. Louis never remembered Colby being away ever, so hearing he was in this village a bit was news to him. 

“oh-, “is all Louis could cough out, his voice sounding on the edge of broken. 

“Yeah, oh,” Harry mimics Louis like he hadn’t just nearly broken his nose. “You did not notice he took time away from there because you were always sniffed up and on drugs,” Harry’s words came out slow and punctured Louis where it hurts, leaving him questioning how good of a friend he was.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” He pushed for an answer as he pushed himself away from the door frame, trying to seem tall. 

“Exactly what I said,” Harry’s eyes wandered over Louis’ body, making the older man feel insecure. “He was always complaining, ‘Louis did this’, ‘I had to look after Louis again, he blows all his money on pills and then I have to bring him home,’ ‘Louis this,’ and ‘Louis that’. So, it means exactly what I’m saying.” Their eyes met, neither of them moving. 

Liam was just existing, not saying a word until Louis’ eyes flashed to him for a second. 

“Harry-,” He tried to speak, but he was cut off, as soon as the words left his mouth. “Go on Liam, lie to him and tell him that’s not what he did. He was sick of the party life. He wanted to settle down, not go out and babysit a grown man with every issue going,” Harry was sticking the knife in, each word pushing it further into his chest. Everything was becoming heavy for Louis. This was why he did it. The pressure from everyone wanting him to be perfect all the time. He was always in his head, constantly worrying about his image and how his father saw him, how his friends saw him that he never asked what his friends wanted. 

Louis could not get a word in between Harry’s constant pressing at his lifestyle. “Enough!” He shouted, making Harry’s voice come to a halt, startling all of them. “Enough,” His voice was lower than before as he stumbled backwards, hands flying to anything to keep himself balanced. The tension in the room was thick with anger and hurt, none of the boys moving or saying anything. The only noise that could be heard was Louis’ heavy breathing.

“You have no idea,” Louis did not know whether he was about to shout up a storm or cry excessively after that statement left his tongue, “you live in a small village where no one knows you and nobody cares who you are.” Anger; Louis knew his words were now coming from anger. The anger he had kept hidden as his father had mistreated him, the anger that he had to stay hidden from who he was because he did not fit his father’s image of the perfect son. He now had the anger that he never really knew his friend and the only person to blame was him. It was always Louis’ fault. 

“What? We have no idea about what? The life of money and expensive cars? Come on Louis speak up,” Harry sounded like he was tormenting Louis, just as his father did when Louis let himself be vulnerable. 

“It's not all it seems, curly top. The flashing lights. The perfect image; I’m straight and I am going to marry a successful, rich woman. The constant people on your ass to get everything perfect the first time. The life of money sucks big time. Take it if you want it, but you would not last a day.” Louis stifles out a laugh as his words sound thick with poison. 

“Boo-hoo, hard work is stressful,” Harry laughs, and before he knows it, he is on the floor with Louis’ smaller figure towering over him, throwing heavy punches to his face and top half of his body. Liam tries to pull Louis off Harry’s body, but Louis pushes him back. He gives it another attempt, finally throwing Louis to the other side of the room. He stands between the two, both arms out, making sure they both keep their distance. “You’ve got a temper, I’m guessing that’s from daddy,” Harry mocks. “Yeah, I guess having a homophobic father that does not care how you are because he’s more into the money and the image does that to a person, but you do not have a clue,” Louis lets out a laugh as he spits blood onto the floor, only then does he realise Harry got a few hits in to.  
Without a word, Louis grabs his keys from the table and exits the house. He had no idea what he was going to do.

He jumps up onto the brick wall outside of the house and pulls out his cigarettes, breathing in the toxic smoke. The door opens not long after Louis finished smoking, the shouting from inside the house had died down and someone was making their way over to him. Louis did not take his eyes from his fingers until someone's feet came into his view, then he felt a presence next to him.  
“I’m sorry,” The voice he recognised to be Harry’s said quietly, Louis did not say anything. “I guess I would not be able to handle the rich life,” Harry is speaking in a new tone, unfamiliar to Louis.  
“Why’s that? You don't take well to orders,” Louis joked, making Harry laugh a little. 

“That and I would not be able to be in the closet again,” Louis looked up to Harry, looking all over his face before finally meeting his eyes. “I’m sorry, what are we doing here?” Harry asks as Louis lets out a shaky breath. “No fucking clue.” They both let out a chuckle before heading back inside.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi besties, this is my first story on AO3, I hope you enjoy it. <3


End file.
